02-Oct-1985 Los Angeles,CA Memorial Coliseum, USA
Now, there I was... I was still in high school. I wasn't doing too good. I was doing bad in my studies, and they sent
me down to see the guidance counselor. I walked in, and he said, "Mr. Springsteen, what seems to be your
problem?" So, I said, "Well, sir, it's like, you see.. I don't have any interest in anything. I don't know what I want to
do with myself. I don't care what's going on around me. I ain't got any faith. I don't have any hope in anything. I don't
have any close interpersonal relationship with a member of the opposite sex. I don't have, uhh...
He said, "oh, that's too big a problem. You'd better go home and talk to your folks about it."
So, I went home, I went into the kitchen, my pop was in there. And I said, "Pop, man, I got sent home from school.
I've been in a lot of trouble lately. I really got to talk to you about something. I don't know what's going to happen
with me. I don't have any interest in anything. I daydream in class all the time. I don't have any faith in anything, in
myself, I don't have any hope in anything..."
And he said, "Will you get me another beer out of the icebox?"
So, that was it. I decided I was going to do myself in. I was going to end it all! I was going to say good-bye cruel
world! Yeah! So I got out and I hitchhiked down to Asbury Park. I was going to jump in the ocean and drown
myself. I was sitting there on the boardwalk, contemplating the water temperature... And all a sudden, in the
distance, this big handsome dude came walking. And he came down, sat next to me, started saying our prayers. And
we kinda got talking. And I'm telling him all about my problems. And he started telling me about all his problems.
Then we cried on each other's shoulder for a while. But we decided we'd make a good team, and we became
partners. That's right! That's right...
And Clarence, he said he knew a gypsy lady that could help us out with our troubles. So, over to the gypsy we
went. It was late at night. The boardwalk was deserted. We walked in. We paid our $2.50 each... I had to loan
Clarence his $2.50... And she looked into the crystal ball, and she said, "You boys are in a lot of trouble..." Paid
another $2.50... I ain't got it back yet, either! And we looked... She looked into the crystal ball and then she said,
"You boys are going to go on a real long trip. You're going to seek out new forms of life. You're going to explore
new worlds. You're going to go where no man has ever gone before... And stay twice as long... And have a lot of
fun doing it, too!" She gave us a map to the secret of the world, and she said if we followed that map at midnight,
we'd find the answer to all our trouble.
So that night, we got into Clarence's Oldsmobile, and we started driving south down Route 9. South through the
rain. Down through Lakewood, down through Freehold, down through Toms River. And a hurricane hit! And then a
tore-nad-o blew across the highway! And then a blizzard hit! Then a heatwave broke! And then the roof blew off
the car! And then we got two flat tires! And then, the fenders flew off! And then the engine block cracked! And then
the carburetor went! And then the windows flew out! And then... And then... and then... the RADIO BROKE!!!
You know what that's like!
But there we were, on the side of this dark dirt road. And according to the map, what we were looking for was
just... on the other side... of those woods... So into the forest we went. It was spooky in there. There was sounds
coming from all over the place. Sounded like werewolves. Sounded like homicidal cows! Sounded like mad dogs
barking! Sounded like the Jersey Devil out there! And..
Now, Big Man, I ain't never heard of no killer beasts, like in New Jersey or nothing. Did you? No? I heard of, like,
killer hamburgers, but there ain't no killer beasts... I think we're safe out here, don't you? all right? I think I hear
something behind us.
(whispers) I think I hear something behind us.
(whispers) I think I hear something behind us.
And all a sudden, up behind us, came these two big man-eating bears. But, instead of jumping on us and making us
their dinner, they were acting kind of friendly. And they said, they weren't mean, but they were just lonely. And that
they'd been out here in the woods for a long time by themselves after they escaped from the circus, because they got
tired of living in them cages. And they said, that if we'd be their friends, that they'd help us find what we were looking
for.
And so, back into the forest we went... And all a sudden, the clouds pulled away from the moon, and there in the
clearing we saw the answer to our quest.
(Audience applauds)
And then we said good-bye to the bears for the last time...
And as we stood there in the moonlight, we knew that everything was going to be all right. Because... Because when
we touched...
(Bluetele)