19-Dec-1980 New York,NY Madison Square Garden, USA

Now once... Once upon a time...

GROWIN'UP (start)

There we was! It was me, Clarence, Steve... It was the night before Christmas... And all through the house, not a creature was stirring. Not even a mouse!
We decided we'd go out down to the 7-11 store, get some peanut butter and jelly, get some pop tarts, come back home, live it up. A little TV. We all made a deal that we, I wouldn't buy no presents if they wouldn't buy me no presents. We didn't have no money. This is back in 19... oooh, I don't even remember. And we got in the car, we took off for a ride, and we were on this daaark back road in New Jersey. And them roads, they're dark in New Jersey.
And all a sudden, we got a flat!
So we were trying to decide who'll go out an fix it. Well, I don't have to go out and fix it, because I'm the boss! That's fair! Now, Clarence, he don't have to go out and fix it, 'cause he's bigger than Steve! Steve goes outside, opens up the trunk -- we ain't got no spare. So we start walking down this road. We walked for two miles, three miles, we're trying to hitchhike, nobody'd pick us up. That's right! In our own hometown. And all a sudden, way off in the woods, we hear this sound...

(Audience applauds)

(Clarence does Santa laugh) Ho ho ho

(Roy incorporates "Jingle Bells" into the piano part)

And over in the woods we go... And man!, there's Santa Claus!

(Clarence does Santa laugh again) Ho ho ho

But Santa... Santa, he ain't happy. He's sad! 'Cause he's sitting there, he's got a runner busted off his sleigh, got a whole sleigh-full of presents, he can't go no place!
So, we thought a couple things... First, we thought we'd knock out Santa and steal all the presents. But we're not that kinda guys! So, we all got down, we fixed up that runner on that sleigh, and he took off into the sky. And just as he was going, we just saw the very last blink of his tail lights, and we seen some stuff fall out of the sack, and drift real slow down through the stars, down past the moon, down on to the highway. And we all walked out of the woods, and we looked down to the end of the road, and we saw some stuff start to shine, way down in the darkness.

(Audience applauds)

But right then, that's when we decided... We'd start a band...

GROWIN'UP (last verse)

Merry Christmas to all! And to all a good night!