13-Feb-1977 Toronto Maple Leaf Gardens, Canada
I lost my volume knob! You can't lose your volume knob! That's fucked up!
<guitar noodling w/out volume swells>
I'll be right back...
(Other voice) We'd like to announce Bruce will be right back. Don't go away. The trouble is not in your receiver...
There I was!
<chuckle>
Riding down this dark road, it was about ten years ago. I was in this old... I remember I was in this... I was in '63
Impala that my old man gave me after he racked it up into a tree. And uh... He said if I could scrape it up off the tree, I could have it. So, I scraped it off and it was me and Miami and the Big Man, we was riding down this dark road, like, taking these girls home, you know? Like, we took 'em out to the movies, and we took 'em out to dinner, and we say, "Okay, what you girls want to do now, you know?"
They say, "We wanna go home!"
All right. You know? All right. So, we take 'em down this dark road and I turn the headlights out and I turn off all the lights in the car, so it was so dark, you couldn't see nothing. And we were just getting down this stretch of road, and all a sudden... All a sudden, from out of the sky, came this big flashing light...
<Flubbed guitar sound>
It was a little bigger than that in truth, but that'll have to do for now.
But anyway, sideswiped the Impala, right? I put my foot on the brake, went skidding off into the swamp, right? And like, the girls, they was cursing us, screaming at us and stuff. You know, saying we was assholes and stuff 'cause we didn't know what we were doing. So like, you know, "gimme a break," you know? But it was like..
We looked over in this field, and whatever it was that sideswiped us was sitting there in the middle of the swamp. And it was all shiny and humming, and ummm... Had a STP sticker on the side, Chevy spark plugs on the side, it had Hooker headers and, and it said "Big Daddy Don Garlits." So I said, "Miami, that's Big Daddy Don Garlits over there, man!" And he said it wasn't him, right? I said, "Sure, sure it is. He wiped us off the road." So, we go over there, right? We check it out, we get out of the car, the girls are cursing at us, we walk through the mud, right?
Now, we're sort of uptight, you know? 'Cause like the car's all fucked up, the car's all wrecked up, but we're all muddy, but like, uhh..
So we get over there and the thing's just humming and stuff. All a sudden, opens up, right? The thing opens up, you know? Out comes this cat doing this, like, Michael Rennie impersonation, you know? And he comes stumbling down there, down the ramp, and he says, "hey, you guys, hey..." He talked just like me! It was funny, you know?
He said, "Hey, is this Mars?"
We said, "No, no, no, man. No man, you got the wrong block. Wrong block. This is... we say, we started laughing and stuff. This ain't Mars, man, this is New Jersey, right? Whaddya doing here?
He says, this is New Jersey, huh? He says, "Well, tell me how to get to the Turnpike so I can get this thing out of here," right?
So we said, "No way, man, you wrecked the car on us, the girls are all pissed off at us, we ain't going to tell you how to get to
anyplace. "
So, he said, "Okay, we'll make a deal, make a deal -- Give you guys one wish and ummm... then you tell me the way to the Turnpike.
We said, "All right. All right, I mean that sounds pretty good. So... So, said "Okay Miami, what do you want?" So, Miami thought for a long time, Miami said, "I want a blue suit!"
Boom! In a second, man, he had a blue suit. That's where he got that blue suit. I'm telling you. Right? Yeah!
It's like, then said to the Big Man, "Big Man, what do you want? What's your wish?" Big Man thought a few minutes, consulted with me. We decided, white suit.
Boom! Gets the white suit, man! Big Man standing there like that.
So, like, now it was my time. I was thinking real slick. I was thinking, like, a million bucks...
my own Laundromat.. and, let me see...
New wheels for my car...
Nah, nah...
So finally I said, "Okay, Mr. Spaceman...
Mr. Spaceman...
Mr. Spaceman, I wanna be...
Mr. Spaceman...
My wish is...
I wanna be...
I wanna be...
I wanna be...
A rock 'n roll star!"
(Bluetele)